HOW SWINGING HELPED ME

I wasn't going to blog today mainly because of a lack of inspiration. But having just read Smarty's blog post (see https://pleasesendmefree.blogspot.com/2024/04/desirability-differential.html) and Debbi's blog post (see https://enigmainitiative.blogspot.com/2024/04/body-neutrality.html), I've now got inspired to write a post.

I want to give you a brief tour of my journey regarding my relationship with my body.

At boarding school, I wasn't that comfortable with my body. It wasn't helped that my first nickname was Blubber Belly, though it did get shortened to Dub which was far cooler. I never thought I was fat but clearly other boys in my dorm when they saw me undress thought otherwise.

My discomfort with my body also wasn't helped because I was a late developer, only hitting puberty after turning sixteen years old. I always made sure I was last in the communal showers.

I became far more comfortable with my body after I left school - I think many people get body issues at school and especially boarding school. Kids can be cruel sometimes.

Though I've never had what I call a man's body - ripped muscles, hairy chest and facial hair, I was generally fit and healthy as I played a lot of sport.

However, it was only in my late forties and early fifties that I became totally comfortable in my skin. These years were the start of my swinging years. With my then partner, I would regularly meet up with other couples for sex and would regularly host sex parties for couples.

Whenever meeting other couples or attending sex party, or even going to a sex club, being self-conscious about my body wasn't going to make swinging enjoyable for me and even others. Also, I saw plenty of naked bodies and soon realised that bodies come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. I never had a problem stripping off in front of other people and I never felt unconfident about my body.

Swinging helped me a lot in feeling very comfortable about my body. Also the sex was good too!


Comments

  1. Debbi (Enigma)April 8, 2024 at 8:20 AM

    It's interesting how the different experiences in our lives can affect us, isn't it? I went to public school, kids were cruel there too.

    I'm glad swinging was able to help you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bow and Arrow ManApril 8, 2024 at 8:25 AM

      Kids can be cruel everywhere. The major difference between a boarding school and a day school was that there was never any let-up; there was no home to go to for sanctuary.

      Delete
  2. JoyApril 8, 2024 at 11:20 AM

    It was not until my 40's and mostly mid, especially that I truly stopped caring about what my outer vessel looked like .Knowing it was and still is only skin but what is underneath it all that keeps us alive is still what counts the most. Without any of our most vital internal organs, which definitely includes our heart and even our mind, our outer looks or skin is only there to keep them all held together. I said to Deb earlier, we have all know someone in our lives who society deemed as what it considered "Beautiful" yet when it comes to their core, they can be extremely Ugly..

    ReplyDelete
  3. smartyApril 8, 2024 at 11:21 AM

    I've become a bit more accepting because of going to kink parties where people of all shapes and sizes sometimes wear very little, sometimes nothing at all. I think I extend a lot more grace to other folks' appearance than I do to my own though!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bow and Arrow ManApril 8, 2024 at 11:30 AM

      That's often the way. We're often more critical of ourselves than others. And if others are critical, then it says more about them than us.

      Delete
  4. JNApril 8, 2024 at 3:25 PM

    I got picked on a lot in public school. Not because I was fat, but because I wasn't white enough. Kids would come up and asked me why "I" bombed Pearl Harbor. I was in the 2nd grade when this all started, mind you.

    I have found that lifestyle people are more accepting.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Bow and Arrow ManApril 9, 2024 at 1:46 AM

    If only kids could know of the consequences of their words and actions at the time!

    ReplyDelete

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